Personal Development for Musicians: Developing Plans for Success

As a musician, I often find that I’m struggling to remain a well-rounded person. I’m a classical pianist, and for the most part, that translates to a large number of hours spent in the practice room. While that’s great for my technique and musicianship, it’s not so wonderful when I start to think about other aspects of my life. Because I’ve focused so much on practice, it’s easy to feel that I’m underdeveloped in other areas – and that has led me to spend some time and energy on personal development. Although it got me far outside of my comfort zone, I identified several areas of my life that seemed lacking in attention and proficiency. It wasn’t easy to start developing these areas, but it’s been well worth the investment for me. Here are some of the areas of my life that I’ve been working on (besides being a musician, of course) – and I’ve found that development in these areas has helped me to feel well-rounded again.

Written Communication

I’ve always enjoyed creative writing as a hobby, but I’ve realized that professional writing is a useful skill to have when you’re a musician. I’m always interested in finding extra work because, as you know, it can be difficult to make a living on a music career. With writing, I’ve found a way to earn money and use my musical expertise at the same time. There are plenty of ways to do this, which include blogging and guest blogging, writing articles for music publications, writing reviews of other musicians’ performances, developing a web page, and more.

To accomplish this goal of improving my writing skills and becoming a more marketable professional, I picked up a professional writing minor while I was earning my degree in piano performance. It was extra work, but putting in that time and effort has helped me to develop personally and professionally. Other options for improving writing skills include online or distance classes, community college courses, local writing seminars or retreats, and more – just look around to find opportunities near you. If you’re not interested in developing writing skills, try putting some time into a favorite hobby that’s fallen by the wayside. Not only can this become a marketable resource, but it can also help you dissolve the stress and monotony of music practice.

Physical Conditioning

Ever since I can remember, I’ve blown off steam by running. It’s just the most natural way for me to get exercise and reduce stress. I haven’t given it up yet, but sometimes it’s tempting to use that time for practice even though I know I can’t keep practicing without taking a break and expending some energy. I’ve also learned that cardio isn’t enough, so I picked up yoga on a friend’s recommendation and have been doing it ever since. Yoga helps me stay attuned to my body and its role in my performances, which has greatly improved my practice stamina and ability to focus. I would recommend yoga for any musician because of its calming and strengthening effects on the body and mind, but there are also other ways to engage in physical conditioning. Tennis is great for increased hand-eye coordination and strength, as are many other sports, so find something that appeals to you and get out there.

Relationships

When I spent the majority of my free time in the practice room, I learned the hard way that friendships need significant time investments. I was unwittingly alienating my friends, erasing myself from their radar screens, and limiting my social interaction. Even outside of the personal value of good relationships, networking is an important dimension of professional success, so being able to relate to others is a necessary skill. While I was studying to earn my piano performance degree, I joined two campus organizations: one professional music fraternity and one service organization. Getting involved in the ongoing professional conversation is important, so try to find a local group that includes other musicians. It’s also socially enriching to volunteer, and there are plenty of opportunities to do that no matter where you live. You can join a service organization with some of your friends or try something completely unfamiliar, but either way, you’ll be contributing to the common good and to your own personal development.

Bio: Maria Rainier is a freelance writer and blog junkie. She is currently a resident blogger at First in Education where she writes about education, online universities, and what an online degree means in an increasingly technological world. In her spare time, she enjoys square-foot gardening, swimming, and avoiding her laptop.

My Music Marketing Epiphany

As a writer I am kind of happy with this series, nice combination of can’t-help-myself sales hype-type and genuine reflection.

Recently an “Internet Acquaintance” of mine, Shann Vander Leek sent me her book, Life On Your Terms, and as I knew very little about her or her book, it was a pleasant surprise to discover that I really enjoyed it.

Actually, I didn’t just “really enjoy it” …

I flippin’ loved it!

Here’s the email I sent to Shann before I had even finished reading it:

Hi Shann,

I am dipping in and out of your book and each time it’s like an inspiration espresso!

Accordingly, the following is pretty turbo-charged but I assure you, written by one stone-cold sober musician.

Reading this book, both your words and your interviewees, I have made quantum leaps – especially in the areas of legacy, clarity and courage – and (very rare) was on the verge of tears just a moment ago due to several impactful moments in a short space of time as I flipped randomly through knockout chapter after knockout chapter, too buzzed to read for long without acting on my passion – right now.

Suffice to say I’ll be publishing a glowing review, but more importantly: thank you for showing me that I am not alone in my idiosyncratic outlook on life, and in doing so, multiplying my power to rock by about one million megahurtz.

The book is a collection of interviews with some very inspirational and inspired people. Some of the quotes are awesome. The following quote in particular, by Canadian businessman Perry Niehaus, shattered some block in my mind with a powerful intensity that had me spinning in my chair and wondering what just hit me:

When you come to understand that there is nothing to fear, life will progress. Everything that happens in our lives that hurts us or holds us back is based on fear. When we can completely give up our fear, we can do anything.

As well as conquering fear, there is a running theme in the book about legacy. I have been guilty of never really giving much thought to the concept, until recently, as the reality that my little girl is one day going to grow into a young adult who will no doubt read and listen to my writing and music and otherwise look to my (increasingly huge) public record of thoughts, opinions and actions for guidance.

Thankfully, having just conquered fear, I did not go into a panic at the thought!!!

Instead I made a commitment in writing to what I want my legacy to be. I might even publish that process here soon, but the point is, it was this fantastic book that helped me to look myself square in the face and really have a good think about what it is I represent, what I stand for, what I contribute to the greater good.

So in closing, if you harbour a desire to break free from the shackles of drudgery, discover and/or start living your passion and could use a little push – well this ain’t the book for you – because it will give you a BIG push. Seriously, I developed such an action-bias while reading this it was like I had ADHD; I just kept getting so inspired to go for it I had to get up every few minutes and take descisive action towards the fulfillment of my truest desires.

Do yourself a big favour – go buy Life On Your Terms – it will be an investment that pays off handsomely, no doubt about it.

You may or may not have noticed that I have not written as much for Rebel Zen of late as I used to. There is a twofold explanation for this:

1) Lack of time – not a lot I can do about this at the moment; gotta put food on the table.

2) Negative frame of mind – basically, I am a musician who also writes personal development stuff, and over the years of I have noticed a roller-coaster shaped trend to my personal development content output based on my reoccurring and longish cycles of depression.

Basically when I am feeling groovy, I write lots of personal development stuff, but when I am going through a prolonged “dark night of the soul” my armchair-Zen-style blatherings tend to dry up (which is very inconvenient because it is quite a lucrative writing market for me when I have good momentum going).

Zen and the Art of Being Miserable?

When I am dark, I find it easy to keep writing music, because these are works of art that feel fully at home with states of mind of like depression, anxiety and paranoia. After all where would some of my favourite musicians like Nick Cave, Pink Floyd or Morrissey be without their “black dogs”?

But it would be hypocritical of me to write about meditation, enlightenment and success ideas when I am failing to practice what I preach. Besides, it’s impossible, I can only write from the heart.

So, suffice to say, I have been in one of these stretches of feeling down for all of this Australian winter, which happened last winter too. By “feeling down” I mean depressed moods, hopelessness, anxiety, paranoia and fear.  The question is – why?

SAD … and Other Suspects

Well, this is complex, but through trial and error I have found that alcohol doesn’t help, so cutting right back on that makes a big difference. Also I have been mighty, mighty tired for the last couple of years, which is par for the parenting course, but nonetheless, no doubt aggravates the problem.

Further, the fact that I have been lately afflicted during winter leads one to suspect a case of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). And, let’s face it, with my extended, outrageous youth not that far behind me and my remaining taste for the occasional toke of the old University Cigarette (if one should happen to be passed around), I may have simply screwed my nerves up for sake of experimentation and kicks.

Anyway, causes aside, being male, all I really care about is “how can I fix this quickly, cheaply and without having to talk to anyone about it?”, so I was quite chuffed when “The Universe” or (insert preferred deity here) sent me some unexpected help in the form of a book by Brenda Shoshanna called “Fearless: The 7 Principles of Peace of Mind.

I read this book while at my worst point in my mid-winter blues, where my anxiety and paranoia was so bad as to be almost quite silly. Cars would drive up our quite street at night while I was trying to sleep and I would feel startled, worrying that “they” were coming to get me. Crazy stuff like that; quite absurd really, but nonetheless disconcerting.

A West-Meets-East Zen Approach

Well this book, Fearless, is all about how to combat these feelings, with just the kind of West-Meets-East Zen approach that I love, so it really hit the spot.

It helped me at night (when my anxiety was at its worst) to lie in bed before sleeping and go over the book. Chapters like “Recognising the Voices Within” and “Meeting Fear Face-to-Face” really helped me to work through things quietly on my own.

I guess the main points of the book were not new to me, being an old self-help/Zen-waffle junkie from way back, but it is always great to be reminded of the core ideas of Eastern philosophy and how they really are very liberating.

After all, unless you’re on a ship that is actually sinking or you are literally being physically attacked right now or something horrible like that, the rest of our fear and anxiety is an imagined load of old cobblers – fantasies with little-to-no basis in reality (reality being NOW).

I could go on forever, but let me rest by saying that if you have any problems with fearfulness, anxiety and/or paranoia then I highly recommend that you get your hands on Fearless: The 7 Principles of Peace of Mind as soon as possible because it may help you as much as it helped me to feel better.

(By the way, I am generally feeling much better thanks, I have kept the booze to a minimum, boring as that may be, and the days down-under are getting longer, and while I am not on any kind of high, things certainly don’t seem as bleak to me as they did a month or two ago. And soon – the spring!)

Now that I have made the commitment to blogging here again, I have been pondering what this blog is actually about. To start with it was about “personal development”, “self-improvement” and “success” but I have never felt comfortable with any of these labels whatsoever.

I think I prefer to decide that this blog is about “Meaning”.

Why? Because that’s what we all need and crave in this life – Meaning – and big time.

It is my humble opinion that all of human activity, everything we do, is shaped and coloured by the fact that we are given life, wonder “why?”, get no answer and then have to die. This shaky sequence of events, facts and mystery is the foundation on which the entire human condition is built.

But Why?

The thing that sets us apart from the animals, as far as we know, is that we hit the age of 2 or 3 and suddenly we wonder: “Why?”

It’s like – all this stuff exists … ok … got my head around that …

… but why?

Why does it exist? Why is my Mummy so tall? Why am I eating potatoes? Why does the dog have black hair with a white stripe on his nose?

In fact (can you tell I have a 2.5 year old kid?) it is very interesting to follow the train of thought of a toddler and discover in this, the entire problem of “being human” – we just don’t know what it all means. (Some people think they do of course, but they have no precise way to verify their beliefs about meaning so it cannot be denied that they are anything more than conjecture.)

Here’s a hypothetical discussion with my 2 year old:

Daddy what are you doing?

I am working.

But why?

Because we need money.

But why?

Because if we don’t have money then we can’t buy food or clothes or toys.

But why?

Because this is the system that is set up, it’s called Capitalism.

But why?

Well, truly, I don’t know why Capitalism exists, probably because of all the systems they have tried, it is the one that seems to work, albeit far from perfectly.

But why?

Dunno – maybe because it is the system that most honestly addresses and mirrors human nature.

But why?

Because humans are by nature very concerned with getting things, with survival and with the pursuit of pleasure.

But why?

Because that’s how our brains are wired up – we chase pleasure and avoid pain and do our damndest to survive.

But why?

Because that’s just what animals do and we are animals.

But why?

But why are we animals? Well … because we just are. Nobody knows the answer to that question.

But why?

Because when you ask the question, you’ll never get an answer.

But why?

You’ll never know why you never get an answer to this either. We do not truly know why we exist and we never get an answer when we ask the question. It’s just a big, big mystery.

I wonder if you started with any question whether it would always come down to the eternal question that every human must ask and never get an answer to: Why?

So I guess that’s what this blog is about – it’s about the eternal, fruitless search for Meaning (yes, with a capital M) and what to do about that.

It’s not really about trying to sell you on an answer – because there is none. Rather, this blog is about finding ideas and ways to cope with the absence of Meaning, and to connect with others along the way – so please, drop me a line and say G’day!

I was just reading a blog post that explained something I kind of knew but hadn’t really thought about – that the old gatekeeper barriers (to a career in the creative arts, creative business, etc) that the Internet has famously blown away were only ever a smokescreen anyway and that the real barrier still exists – hard work, persistence, focus – all that tough stuff that we don’t wanna do a lot.

Just so happens that I was also just reminiscing with an old friend who I used to live with in the 90s and with whom I have recently made contact with again ala Facebook. We were talking about where the time goes and how did we get this “old” already so fast and I said something about how I wish I could time travel so I could go back and tell the very happy-go-lucky 26 year old me to get the fuck on with it and do some hard work (that mattered, as opposed to tending bars until 4:30am like a crazed go-bot for minimum wage).

Then the thought struck me that I CAN time-travel and that I SHOULD and that in fact it is VITAL to do so.

I can and should travel forward through time to when I am 46, then turn around and travel back through time to now and be the 46 year old me and tell the current 36 year old me to get the fuck on with it and do some hard work (that matters, as opposed to lazily doing cool shit like write the odd blog post, build the odd website and strum the odd guitar chord until 4:30pm before going in for a pre-dinner snack like a dazed slow-bot).

Do you get me? What I am saying is that when I am 46 I am potentially going to feel the same about me NOW as I do about me ten years ago – which is that it’s all very well and very nice but for God’s sake – there is SO much opportunity right now for those who work their arses off.

Don’t get me wrong: I am all for, you know, being all like, Zen but Hey! News Flash! Zen dudes work harder than, like, anyone, you know?

ok I do work pretty hard, but I can always work harder.

Do you find yourself confused as to what your main direction in life is? Do you find yourself exploring This and then That and then berating yourself because you reckon you should have spent that time working on One Major Purpose instead of allowing yourself to get distracted?

Well, if so, RELAX!

Maybe you aren’t wasting time at all!

Maybe – just maybe – you are in the process of creating something amazing and highly original by combining different concepts and fields into One New Thing – a new category even!

READ

Can’t see how this applies to you and your disparate interests? Well, then maybe you need to explore this concept a bit more. Some good books to read are “Purple Cow” by Seth Godin, “Blue Ocean Strategy” by W. Kim and R. Mauborgne and “The Medici Effect” by Frans Johansson. All great books about the importance and methods of creating extraordinarily original offerings.

DRAW

Another awesome method of seeing where the connections lie is mind-mapping. If you are such a tech-head that you need to, you can find software to help with this, but personally I prefer a pen and the back of an envelope – this way I just bang out the ideas in my head, explore the connections, and move on to doing some real work. I don’t recommend spending hours fluffing about with this kind of thing, because it’s not real work, but a quick mind-mapping sessions can certainly help when inspiration strikes – or when it doesn’t.

Fly in the Face of Convention

This concept of combining seemingly unrelated fields of endeavor into a new original category or offering can be difficult for others to understand if you try and spell it out to them as a hypothetical theory. For example, my (always evolving) offering involves combining original music, humour, writing, personal development and entrepreneurship into my One Thing, but unless it serves a purpose (such as to illustrate my point), I don’t try to get people to understand this ambitious plan. Why? Because …

A) I don’t need the let-down when people don’t get it (because it sounds ridiculous to them) and tell me I’m crazy.I know I’m crazy anyway – and I don’t give a fuck! I like it!

B) I don’t fully understand my One New Thing yet myself! It’s an ever-evolving exploration of Self, through which I hope to help others to realize their own True Nature and/or simply to enjoy living more.

C) Because you don’t have to be able to explain it as a theory. It’s just not necessary!

Have a look around and you will find that truly original Creators are Do-ers and tend to either not be very self-analytical, or if they are, they keep this to themselves and just get on with creating the Original Work.

Then what happens? Other, not-so-original thinkers come along, formularize the original innovations, and reproduce lame Robo-Creations that have no soul and are in every way inferior.

Case in point? Jimy Hendrix. Originality oozed out of the man’s pores; he was instincively unique. Since he blew everybody’s minds his style has been rehashed to the point where it is in itself a sanitized and overwrought cliche.

Don’t do the same old shit. Try harder! Combine your different interests and see what you can come up with! Analyse everything about yourself and find what it is that makes you You.

It’s not always easy, but actually being original, then working really hard at getting that “out there” is one of the major laws of success. Good luck!

If there is something you are truly shit scared of doing then I reckon that the best gift you can possibly give yourself is to step up to the plate and do it. But how do you get yourself off the couch and into the fire? Here’s a couple of personal examples of how I managed to confront my worst fears and come out reasonably unscathed.

Flying into the Face of Fear

Ok – so “feel the fear and do it anyway” has become one of many clichés in the Personal Development world, but nevertheless, like most clichés it contains a powerful truth. I have repeatedly found that if something is worth doing then it is probably going to be a bit scary. Why? Because it means stepping outside of your comfort zone and risking failure.

I can think of several occasions where this has been true for me: getting on an airplane to fly from Australia to Europe for example. Despite all the comforting statistics, my Taoist/Zen philosophies and my deep breathing techniques, I still hate flying and the longer the flight the more jittery I get. Nevertheless, it meant a hell of a lot to me to see Ireland, the country of my immediate ancestry and France, my wife’s country of birth, so I got on the damn plane and strapped myself in. The failure I was scared of was fairly remote (crashing) but like most fear, rational thinking had nothing to do with it. I was shitting bricks for months in advance and had repetitive nightmares (about falling out of a disintegrating airplane hull and down through the air to wind up bobbing about in a burning sea waiting to drown) in the weeks leading up to and during the trip away.

Well, suffice to say, the plane didn’t crash, although it did seem likely at one point. We were flying over the Himalayas and the old bird relentlessly shook and bumped like a bronco for three hours while lightning strikes outside briefly illuminated grim stewardesses faces, their South-East Asian complexions looking decidedly pale and disconcerted. Meanwhile my wife, who isn’t scared of flying – just of apparently imminent and genuine catastrophes – was sobbing uncontrollably into my lap about how she didn’t want to die this way.

That bit wasn’t so cool, but apart from that I enjoyed the trip immensely. If I hadn’t gone the pain of the real failure would have slowly have eaten away at me. Some opportunities you just have to take, not to do so would just lead to future dissatisfaction and remorse – and this would have been the real failure.

How To Puke and Shit at the Same Time

The airplane journey from Hell was a couple of years ago now, but just yesterday I confronted another fear and transmuted it into achievement: I stood up in front of a large crowd and delivered 5 minutes of my own original stand-up comedy material.

The reason I decided to do so was twofold. Firstly, I am a solo singer/songwriter and after many years of hit-and-miss banter between songs, ranging from brilliantly executed comedic genius to embarrassing, lame nervous mumbling, I have long desired to get my act together to the point where the bits between the songs are as reliably entertaining as the songs themselves. Secondly, I just love stand-up comedy so, so much and I have been writing my own material for a couple of years and secretly coveting this particular flavour of the limelight – after all, I know I am a funny guy, I just get too many laughs out of people to doubt this. So why not?

I’ll tell you why not … because cracking your mates up with spontaneous one-liners and standing up on stage delivering quality (funny) stand-up comedy are two very different things. I didn’t even need to have done any stand-up to know this is true – it’s just a well known fact. And making a mug of myself in front of rows of un-amused faces just scared the willies out of me.

So for years I avoided acting on it, but as part of my renewed commitment to my live music show this year, I decided it was time to bite the bullet. So I signed up (in a fit of bravado) online for the annual Raw comedy competition here in Melbourne, Australia. (Home of the International Melbourne Comedy Festival, Melbourne is an awesome place for live stand-up comedy.)

As the event drew closer I began to wonder if I should just call up and drop out. But no, I didn’t. Not because I am particularly brave but because the true extent of the fear I was going to have to face just wasn’t kicking in yet. Unlike long plane flights, I don’t get that nervous in advance of stage performing, mainly because I have been getting up and singing in public since I was eighteen (so that’s nearly half my life). But, I do get quite nervous the night before and all during the day of the event and I knew I would be super-nervous before this because of that fact that when it comes to stand-up comedy, quite obviously, I had no idea what I was doing. I was (and still am) a complete comedy noob.

Watching other people do something doesn’t prepare you for doing something. Reading “how to” books about doing something doesn’t prepare you for doing something. The only thing that prepares you is having a go and getting some experience under your belt.

Two weeks out from the event I realised that if I didn’t start preparing soon then I was a dead duck. But the trouble was I wasn’t sure where to rehearse. I sure as hell wasn’t going to do it at home on front of my wife and child, and I wasn’t about to shell out to hire a rehearsal room so I found a novel solution. I have been in the unenviable position lately of having to drive into the city between two and four times a week (for work). This drive takes me about an hour in the traffic, and everyday I see people apparently talking to themselves in other cars. I presume they are talking to people on speaker-phone into their cell phones. So, I figured, if I were to be practicing my stand-up routine aloud in the car to myself as I fly down the highway at 100 kilometers an hour, other drivers would probably assume I was just another tosser using his mobile phone on the go. Perfect!

After nearly two weeks, I had a routine that I hoped was good memorized, but I hadn’t yet bothered to time it. Often I would actually stop for a few seconds while I was running through it in order to concentrate on driving (it wouldn’t be very funny if I crashed while cracking funnies to myself now would it … or would it?). So I decided the time had come to go out to my bungalow office and put up with the fact that my wife and my neighbours could probably hear me and run through the routine with a stopwatch.

It came to 12 minutes! Whoops – the competition only gives each contestant 5 minutes each – and unlike the music business where people just tend to do little more than complain privately about stage-hogs who go over their allotted timeframe, in the comedy world you get a very blunt “fuck you” in the form of a red light in your face, followed shortly by loud music and a dead microphone should you fail to take the first hint!

So I went through the material and chopped it ruthlessly back to five minutes. Trouble was I had been over and over this stuff so much without any audience feedback that I had little idea if I was cutting out the funny stuff or not. I would just have to wait and see on that one.

The big day arrived, and although my wife (a classic ‘shrinking violet’) was apparently catatonic with fear, I felt ok. A little highly strung perhaps, but apart from a few truly non-Zen moments, I was cool … or so I thought.

It was an afternoon gig, and as I drove into town to face the music (although strangely not literally for once) I ran over my material one more time for good luck. Suddenly I was struck with a terror powerful enough to stop a nation. As far as I could tell, there was absolutely nothing funny about the useless drivel I had been rambling on about to myself over the past two weeks, and it would be best for everyone if I just turned the car around and went home and got really drunk by myself in the dirty gap under the house.

But no, fool that I am, I continued on. I walked into the venue and, as it was a first round heat of a competition, there were about twenty other wanna-be’s there for a briefing. I felt relieved that nothing the organisers had to say was disconcertingly new to me. Do your five minutes and get off basically. Not a problem. Then the doors opened and as I sat there waiting for my friend to rock up and hold my hand, it was just me and a bunch of gloomy, sweaty-palmed hopefuls sitting around, trying to avoid eye contact and sipping on beers a little too fast. It was very similar to the atmosphere in a plane shortly before take-off. Actually (minus actual screaming, I suppose) this was more like the atmosphere in a plane, shortly after take off, in which the captain has announced that he’s a lunatic terrorist and intends to fly the plane really fast into something really hard.

I truly didn’t care about winning the competition, I just wanted to do the gig, remember my lines, and hopefully get a few laughs, nevertheless the nerves began to play major havoc, especially when actual people began pouring through the doors in disturbingly large numbers. I had imagined a tiny crowd of about twenty other funny guys and their girlfriends, but obviously others in the line-up were not so shy of inviting their entire Facebook friends list along to the gig! Fuck!

Crunch Time…

(…”crunch” being the sound my balls make when they voluntarily compress together in an attempt to form a new black hole to suck me into in order to save me from hideous embarrassment and a life of bitter regret…)

Once I had watched about two contestants be really, really good (funny) and two others really, truly woeful, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to puke or shit or both at the same time.

Then my moment came, they called my name out over the pumping music, the applause still continuing from the act before and I was walking up the stairs to hit the stage.

How it went isn’t important, or maybe I am just saying that because it didn’t go fantastically well. Not that I can remember it very clearly. I don’t know about other performers, but my time on stage is usually all a vague blur to me as soon as it is over and the more nervous I am the more this is true.

I certainly wasn’t the funniest there on the day, not by a long shot, but I did get a few laughs here and there. That’ll do me for starters.

I didn’t forget my lines, but I went so fast due to extreme nervousness that I ended up reinstating some of the material I had axed. Really what I should have done (and I knew it at the time but just couldn’t seem to find the brakes) was slow down and give the jokes some air.

I discovered just how fucking horrible it is when you crack a joke and nobody laughs … and I felt the sweet, sweet relief when people did. I spontaneously dropped in a couple of ad-libbed moments, and to my surprise they got the biggest laughs. I don’t think this was because the jokes were better, but because they didn’t come out sounding scripted, which, to my detriment, the pre-prepared stuff did (but that’s the key to stand up, apparently, appearing spontaneous when delivering tightly scripted material).

Oh, and I didn’t get through to the next heat, but I really didn’t care about this. Why? Because I know for a fact that many of Australia’s most successful comedians didn’t make it through their heat in this long-running competition, and they made it anyway. How? Well, I don’t know but I can hazard a guess: persistence and hard-work. Or maybe they knew who to sleep with, I dunno…

I went home that night happy that I had faced my fear and rode it through. And I went home determined to do it again, and again, until I get better at it and can relax up there in the (incredibly bright) glare of the spotlight and just ramble away like I do when I am cracking up my mates.

So how do I suggest you face your fears and do it anyway? Well, just make the initial commitment and then get ready for the ride. Buy your plane ticket, book your spot on stage, or lock yourself in for whatever it is you want to do. Then, when the time comes, – - just do it.

…and you don’t even need a new pair of Nikes.

Photo by Fluzo

OK so my last post was a bit hardcore, but it was meant to be. I wanted it to be a short, sharp, unexpected shock.

Why? Because I don’t want Rebel Zen to be just another blog. In fact, Steve and I do not intend Rebel Zen to just be a blog but something much more multi-faceted than that.

We have both of us had a break from regular posting in order to refresh and now I think we are ready to come back to Rebel Zen with a fresh perspective for 2009. And no, it’s not going to turn into a ‘doom and gloom’ activist blog BUT we are hoping to shake up the personal development scene as best we can – to confound expectation. That’s why it’s ‘Rebel’ Zen not ‘Feel Good Zen’, y’know?

What I am interested in is how can we move boundaries around and mix the idea of a personal development brand with activism, with art-for-art’s-sake, with music, with offline ‘real world’ happenings, and with whatever else we want to throw into the mix. And importantly – how can we make this something about ACTION not just IDEAS – because ideas are fantastic but without action they are just puffs of smoke on the breeze.

So yes, life is wonderful; we have the opportunity to jump on the back of life and ride it like an untamed stallion. It might not always go the way we want it to, but if we work with it then we just may find it leads us to water.

Yin, Yang and The Underlying Whole

The juxtaposition between ‘Life is fucked’ and Life is wonderful’ is the Yin Yang model at work. This model, so often co-opted and turned into a cliche, is an incredibly powerful concept (or rather underlying fact of existence) which, true to its own nature, is at once so simple and so complex that I find it hard to write about the mind-splitting ruminations I have had about its fundamental importance. I’d like to explore this some more this year.

And underlying the opposites of Yin and Yang is the Tao which is complete and all-inclusive. Represented by a simple circle, the Yin Yang model fits into it and is embraced by the Tao. And so as MonkMojo said in the comments under the last post:

“Reality contains the fucked, non-fucked and an infinite number of fucked flavors in between. It is complete. ”

This is truth. But nevertheless, this kind of psycho-babble may be of little help to you if you are having a hard time of it right now because sometimes when you are going through Hell, it can be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. To help with this, in the next post, I will go through some practical ways to experience less of the ‘fucked’ and more of the ‘wonderful’.

Stay tuned and meanwhile, here’s to 2009! May it be wonderful!

Seamus Anthony

Photo of laughing girls by A4gpa

But it’s true; life on Earth is actually pretty fucked up.

We live on an insane planet full of misery, illness and evil. Right now millions of people are dying of horrible illness, injuries caused by accidents, crime and war or they are starving to death. They are starving to death because of “man’s inhumanity to man”, in other words they are dying because those in power are too evil and selfish to do the right thing.

People, often innocent women and children, are terrified, injured and/or dying because of war. Stop and think for a minute what war is, how truly insane and disgusting it is: Governments sending armed soldiers (usually under-educated, immature men who have been encouraged to act like savages) with high-tech weaponry to tear other people’s flesh, to smash heads and bodies in a splatter of gore, to put other people through massive, unbearable agony, burning, disfiguring, severing limbs – babies, children, women, men. The horror is so hard to face up to, so easy to ignore and yet so real for a great number of people.

“Disgusting”, you mutter – but ask yourself this: did you vote for a government that willingly sanctioned this kind of behaviour? Even Obama, while I am more than happy to give him the benefit of the doubt (God knows we could use a saviour) is, unfortunately, more than likely to give the green light to acts of barbarism and violence at some point in his reign.

You Were Never Asked If You Wanted To Be Here

Think about it. It’s one of the greatest tragedies of life, that we were squeezed out of our mother’s wombs only to discover sooner or later that we landed in a world of pain and suffering, some unnecessary, but ultimately unavoidable.

And for what purpose? Nobody knows. Some claim to know, but truly, nobody has a clue why we exist.

And we don’t exist for very long either. If you’re in your twenties, then I’ve got news for you: in the blink of an eye you’ll be in your mid-thirties and you’ll be wondering where the hell all that endless time went as life forces you to work and work and work and work…

So there it is, we all live pointless, doomed lives, and before you and your loved ones eventually die, you will no doubt experience suffering to some extent – most likely by painful, drawn-out illness.

So What Are You Going To Do About That?

That’s my point: Life is precious so what are you going to do with it?

And what are you going to do about all the extra, needless and easily avoidable suffering that evil people and corrupt systems add to the heap on top of the unavoidable sufferings of life? And this question goes for me too because – mark my words – I am as guilty of selfishness and inaction as the next guy.

What are you going to do? Fiddle with another wordpress widget while precious time slips away and while children watch their parents maimed and murdered? Write another top-ten-ways-to-hit-the-front-page-of-Digg while parents watch their children die of curable diseases because drug companies are too profit-driven to reach out and help? Watch another episode of Law and Order when you could be letting your light shine and inspiring people to build a better world?

These are the realities I am facing up to in 2009. What about you? Because soon my friend, you and I will be dead – and what if we ARE held accountable at the end? Will we hang our heads in shame? At this point I still believe that I would, and given the fact that death can come at any time, I know that I need to change this about myself and get moving.

It’s time to mobilize, people! Get busy!

By Seamus Anthony